Linora is sitting on the lakeshore with her feet in the water, sandals lying on the grass beside her, leaning back on her hands and watching the clouds rolling by. Sun on her face, breeze in her hair... her mind is a million miles away.
Carise comes quietly down to the lake, work abandoned for now for a break, to get her mind off of everything else. Shivering slightly as a gust of wind blows by, she pulls her light sweater a bit closer, glancing around as she does. Spotting Lin, she takes a few steps to the Apprentice, tilting her head. "Lin?" She asks softly, not wanting to disturb the girl.
Linora blinks as her name is called, looking over her shoulder with a faintly surprised expression which quickly turns to relief. Visitors at the lake aren't always good news, she's found. But she likes Carise. "Hey, Carise." A little smile lights her face as she pulls her feet out of the water, drawing her knees up to her chest to hug them.
Carise smiles in greeting, taking the last few steps over, tilting her head to glance at the water, before blue gaze slips down onto Lin. "Mind if I sit down? It so nice out, perfect for just sitting." If you are lucky enough to have the opportunity.
Linora nods absently, not thinking that maybe she should be working or studying instead of sitting right here. But anyone could see Lin's a little distracted. Has been for quite a little while now. Good thing she's got probably the most oblivious mentor in the craft. "Sure," she says, her smile brightening a bit as she leans back on her hands to look back out over the water. "Yeah... it is kind of a nice day and stuff." Spring.
Carise slips quietly to the ground, tilting her head to peer curiously at Linora. "Are you okay Lin?" Well, there really isn't a question about that. Pulling her legs up underneath her skirt, she watches the girl curiously.
Linora shrugs, one shoulder lifting a bit, frowning lightly. "Sure," she says lightly, keeping her face turned toward the water in the hope that it won't give her away, like usual. "Why?" But she can still feel Carise's eyes on her, and shifts a little uncomfortably.
Carise continues to gaze at the girl, her head tilted slightly to one side as she looks at Lin's face. "You just seem so... quiet." Not that it may not be normal, or anything, but yeah.
"I dunno." Linora grins a little. "Guess I don't got a lot t'say?" /Is/ it unusual? She chews her lip, unable to remember what she used to be like. But she figures maybe she ought to try to come up with some kind of explanation. One finger scratches in the wet sand on the water's edge, digging up tiny stones. "Just... um... thinkin', I guess."
Carise pulls her legs a little closer, tilting her head slightly. "Whatcha thinking about?" A thoughtful smile forms on her face, as she blinks a few times. "Do you want to talk, come up with something to say?"
Linora swings her head around to look at Carise, pale eyes searching. Weighing her options. Deciding. Then looks back out over the water. "How'd you know, whatcha wanted t'do with your life?" She picks at the sand a little more, coming up with a smooth little stone, which she turns over and over in her fingers, unable to sit completely still.
Such a hard question! "How did I...." Thinking it over a bit longer, she sighs, picking at the grass under her hand. "I guess I always wanted to come here? I'm not sure, really. Why?"
Linora shrugs. "I dunno." She tosses the little stone into the lake - plopsplash! - and sighs. "I useta think I knew what I wanted." Now she digs around in the wet sand looking for another stone. Or something to do with her hand. "I mean... when I came here, I was pretty sure and stuff. Now..." Her fingers close around another smooth stone, tightly, and her voice trails off.
Carise reaches one hand out hesitantly, letting it hover by 'nora's shoulder, unsure what to say or do. "And now you aren't sure? Its all a part of growing up, really..." A half smile and she shakes her head. "What's making you second guess yourself?"
Linora sighs softly, dropping the stone onto the ground and hugging her knees to her chest again. "If I can't help breakin' the rules, maybe I shouldn't be here anyhow." Her and every other apprentice in the craft, she's becoming more and more sure... so why's she feel so guilty about it? Nevermind it's the last thing she should tell a journeywoman... if Carise has her thrown out of the craft, it's one less decision for her... maybe it doesn't matter anymore anyhow.
Carise blinks a few times, hand resting lightly on the girl's shoulder. "Breaking the rules?" Closing her eyes she thinks for a second, before opening them to squint at Lin. "Lin... you're never in trouble... how are you breaking the rules?"
Linora drops her head on her knees. She'd been sure her imagined crimes were painfully apparent, never dreaming that others might not see them. She doesn't lift her head to answer, her voice somewhat muffled. "I can't help how I feel." Even if she's managed not to act on it. Mostly. "I know I oughtta be workin' more and stuff."
Carise pats Lin's shoulder gently, shaking her head. "No one expects you to, Lin? But I can't help if you don't tell me what's wrong..." Closing her eyes slightly, she shakes her head. "You work enough as it is... you aren't a Journeyman expected to waste your life away on work."
Linora lifts her head slowly. Waste? She takes another look at Carise. "That what it's all about? Bein' a journeyman?" She's been working so hard to get to that point, is it only more of the same? Blink. "I thought I'd get t'teach. An' travel, and stuff." And stuff. Stuff you can't do when you're an appy. She drops her chin on her knees again, hugging them tighter. "You prolly couldn't help anyhow." She doubts anybody could.
Carise hurriedly tries to explain, to change her words. "That's not what its all about. But it is work. And teaching, but really, teaching is work too. Do you know, that Derit and I are lucky if we both are free from work at the same time? Something is always coming up." A light tap on the shoulder and she tilts her head. "Don't be so sure about that... I was an appy too, you know."
Linora sighs. "It was okay before... I didn't mind workin'... and waitin' and stuff." She stretches her legs out in front of her, beginning to relax a little as Carise talks about her own relationship. Feet splash into the water, and one hand idly scratches in the wet sand. "But that was when Cress was too." Now everything's wrong, and Lin's pouting like a six-turn-old.
Carise is really sure what to say again. "And now? What's changed... and its okay waiting. Really. Things... change. What you like now isn't always going to be right..." Experience has proven this to Reese.
Yeah, things change. That's not always a good thing, in Lin's opinion. "He's leaving." Her eyes look flat and dead as she stares out over the water, not really seeing it. Is it part of being sixteen that her world is upside down, and she can't imagine feeling any differently than she does right now? Don't ask her, she couldn't say. "And I dunno /what's/ right."
Thumb ends up in Rise's mouth as she idly bites at the tip as she thinks. "He is? Is... is there a specific reason this really matters to you? I mean..." She doesn't really know what she means. "You dunno what to do about it?" A little confused, the Journeywoman doesn't know what to say, no words are ready to come out of her mouth for once.
Why does it matter to her? Linora blinks slowly. How can she explain that it almost matters more to her than being promoted? Her jaw works soundlessly, then she gives up, getting to her feet and picking up her sandals. "Nevermind," she murmurs, looking at the grass. Maybe Carise /could/ help, if Lin could explain herself... but that won't be today. "I oughtta be getting back and stuff anyhow." She starts up the lakeshore slowly. "See ya."